Feeling the Gravity

We feel it everyday, the gravity. Now I’m not necessarily talking about the gravity we experience of the world but the gravity or weight of “life”, the world, on our minds and shoulders. We all experience it. Take it from someone who faces it daily with depression and anxiety. It isn’t easy and let’s be honest their isn’t a quick fix to it all. Yet through it all I’ve learned to live on and find the strength, support, to be at ease.

We wake up and dread the next following hours. We long for the weekends or better yet we long for the days that once was. I once read a quote that stated, “Depression is when you constantly look back and may stumble at what is ahead, while anxiety has you miss what is in front of you so in turn you exist but never live because you long for what is still to come.”. The truth of the matter is that these two things affect us, not only pressing down on our thoughts but dramatically shifting everything around us.

I’ll be honest to you all, I do suffer from depression and anxiety.  I tend to be alittle too ocd at times in the sense of wanting control. Though I am Christian it does not mean I am perfect nor am I claiming that because I am, that it has disappeared. There have been authors and even pastors I’ve heard about who struggle with it.  Because of these, I have become who I am and in turn have shaped my character. People say I’m random (cause of depression when I shift to defensive mode), I can joke or even appear happy yet there is a war in my mind. I can seem “accelerated” (anxiety), I have so many plans and in knowing time is short I tend to rush things and it only backfires on me. But over the years and truly with God, things have been easier. 

So here I am, telling you it’ll get better. Though you may feel the gravity, keep in mind the present. To be at peace is to be present in the now. Things happen in life, I’ve spoken about this before, there are things we truly will never have control over, nor can you change the past. The true eye opener you could say is this, happiness is not something you pursue but is a state of being. A state of being. Sounds philosophical but repeat it, a state of being. Meaning in this case, to just be, be present, be in the now. It isn’t bad to prepare for the future nore reminisce about the past but don’t stay there. Keep moving forward, truly living by experiencing every second as if it was your last. You aren’t guaranteed the future. 

Now I can also speak about through christian teachings and scripture itself. God has been the reason I no longer have attacks or get into my moods for the most part. That for the most part is in the recognition that God is enough. I don’t need to be famous, be smart, handsome, or truly find the “one”, God is enough. My sufficiency is found in Christ. I’m not saying either that I can drop out of my job or stop eating, no no, I’m saying that he is truly what I need and my focus to truly live this life. In knowing this, just like the psalms or paul mentions, he is our shelter and to not be anxious of anything. When you trust and give it all to God he takes all your weight and puts it to death. Did he not die for our sins and if he cares for the birds and provides for them their needs what more shall he provide for you, a child of the most high? But as well he provides counsel through people, teachers, pastors, counselors, even parents/friends. You are not alone, never alone. Though you may think the weight is too heavy, there are those to help carry the load or even God. Jesus faced every feeling and temptation, he was human, he understands what you are going through.

Take a moment and breathe, feel the air, ignore the phone, hear the sound of your heart beating, you’re alive. All of this and even what you went through or are going through is a blessing. “Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.” (Romans 5:3-4). With this hope we work on being better or as. Christians, hope in Christ and reflecting his image. 

The truth is evident, we will all go through hardships but let that not bring you down. If it does, get up and push on. Life is meant to be lived, though we all experience things differently, see that you are one of many. The gravity is here to help keep us firm on the ground til we ascend to the heavens, in our dreams, pursuits, love and even to God. I speak to all not just Christians though I hope that my words would incite a revelation of who God is. Keep getting up. Be happy, just be, be present, see now, and live. Regret nothing but in turn learn from mistakes and repent of your old ways. Be blessed.

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