I’m looking through countless options online for the perfect ring, the one ring I know for a fact will be worn at all time. Options keep me perplexed and a thought comes to mind, does a ring really symbolize what is going on inside of me? Is it just for show?
Before anyone thinks I’m talking about getting engaged/proposing, I’m not. I’ve been single for 2 years and for the moment, that is not on my mind due to where I’m at in life. I’ve done what most Christians tend to do, wear a promise ring. I know, I know, you could say, “Isn’t it a bit late, you’ve had sex before”. Thing is, it isn’t about what I’ve done or truly what I’m doing to reveal I’m staying “pure”.
Let’s be honest, as believers we’re plagued with temptation. Singleness is not seen as a gift or chance to grow for most believers. We follow godlydating101, other sites, go to conferences, meet and greets, etc. The stigma that has developed is that if you’re not dating, you’re not happy or always having so much fun you can’t commit. The music we hear on the daily promotes lust and pursuing our desires. The media in general is sexualized and being a man in this culture, if I’m not having sex than I’m not “active, living, and etc, as if I’m dead. Being “pure” biblically is seen as a joke. Laugh about it all you want but this is the truth, we as a people don’t Want to wait til marriage.
I’m 26 years old, let me clear some tension and let me be real with you all, I’m not a virgin. I lost my virginity when I was 15, since then I pursued my desires and have been with 4 people. My number is said to be higher but only rumors and lies still around for those who don’t know me. I’m not a saint, I am tempted daily and I can say that I haven’t slept with anyone for about 2 years, since my last relationship. See, something truly changed on how I not only saw sex but being with someone, love or being in love, is special.
I can easily be seen as a joke for my age and my views on these matters but it’s biblical. I’ve learned to be more cautious as of late, not only protecting my heart but being careful I don’t entertain someone. I decided to get a ring to show physically my commitment to God as a promise to wait. Yes, I may not have been pure before but now, today, I uphold to it.
It was easy before believing that love can overcome all with people and we can come together in the sense of believing and upholding to the cultures views. We’re called not to be unequally yoked, waiting and not being consumed by sexual immorality. A way God pours down his wrath is allowing us to be led by our desires so that we see in the end, it is not what we truly need-you can reference it in the book of Romans.
It is truly troubling, for believers to think pure thoughts. In the digital age we are bombarded and try to keep up with an ever engaging culture that is not really connected. We are addicted to moments and self validation, the memories we wish to create or the highlights we she’d into the light, only reveals the state we are in as a people. We have turned from others and in being taught self love , we’ve overdosed and placed ourselves as our own Gods, though imperfect and prone to fail. True love is now misunderstood or abused.
I may be nearing my 30s and I may seem foolish to most for holding on to something God has moved me to be. All I know is that I don’t want to be consumed by my passions. My mind and thoughts are focused on God. If I am to marry, I will wait, pursue and in turn love my wife in all facets, biblically. I don’t need anyones approval but I do intend to follow in obedience what my father set before me and intended.